100 word challenge (by Haidar Kayani)

I cant wait. Tomorrow is Christmas, presents, dinner, Joy and Santa all represent Christmas.
I looked out my window and i saw my snowman melting. Me and my friend spend hours making it.
With his green hat and green scarf, He really likes the colour green! I went outside under the night sky and snowman was gone! I thought he melted so i went back upstairs in despair. Then lying down in my bed. I saw him. He jumped up and grabbed my hand. He flew through the roof and took me across the moon. It was Very Magical Christmas-eve.

1 Comment

  1. Miss White says:

    I really enjoyed reading your writing Haider – it has good suspense to it with the short sentences and it’s cohesiveness.

    I think there are more opportunities for a variety of punctuation such as; ! ‘ and , Also some more adverbial openers of time and place.

    The adverbial phrase ‘in despair’ is very effective. It adds emotion to your writing and I would like to see more of this throughout. Well done!

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