The Lion, the Witch and the wardrobe

Lucy fell a asleep in the house.

Edmund was siting on the witch chair.  susan was play snow fight in the snow.

14 Comments

  1. Abdul5DT says:

    well done hamza! You used capital letter and full stops

  2. mothna says:

    WOW!!!! That is wonderful!! I hope you are proud of your writing !!I WAS SHOCKED AFTER I SAW THAT!! 😀

  3. miguel says:

    It was good but maybe you can add more ditars like who is the white whirch and way is Edmonde there and who is Edmonde .

  4. nawaz says:

    I like your sentences,but make sure you have a capital letter for Susan’s name.

  5. iram says:

    amazing writing but when you rote Edmund sat on the witch chair it didn’t make sense you need to put Edmund sat on the witches chair you need to put that because it belongs to someone.

  6. leah5 says:

    Hamza! WOW! I have never seen anything like this before, it’s the best writing you have ever seen on your blog posts. Though to make them even more splendid, magnificent and marvelous, I’d suggest putting some adjectives in. For instance, Lucy fell asleep in the big, fancy house. Other than that, you have used capital letters and punctuation in the right places. I’ll look forward to your future posts.
    -Leah.

    1. satam says:

      I was going to say the same thing leah .

  7. katie5 says:

    well done hamaza you did very well on your work i really liked it but you should check what you rote .

  8. reece3 says:

    grate work hamza

  9. Abdul5DT says:

    you should make longer sentences and 2A,4A,BOYS. Anyways you made good sentences

  10. wareesha says:

    Great sentence Hamza! make sure it makes scence here’s some corections:Edmund was sitting in the witch’s chair. Susan was playing in the snow having a snowBall fight. Keep up the good work!

  11. lujane says:

    well done hamza you need to look at your work so please correct but good try

  12. thomas11 says:

    Hamza that was great.Remember to use capital letters.

  13. hira says:

    Well done Hamza good descriptive setences

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