Truth or dare

“I dare you,” Jack whispered, ” don’t worry, I’ll be right behind you.”  Needing to win this dare so I could prove my brother wrong, I carefully stepped into the creepy, dark, gloomy woods. Day suddenly turned into night as I tip-toed into the woods, the bright glow of day hidden by the gnarled, twisted trees. Suddenly, I heard a faint rustle in the bushes that seemed to be getting louder and louder. As I walked on I suddenly realized that Jack was no longer behind me, instead there was a dark creature, as dark as night standing in his place…

8 Comments

  1. Miss Durcan says:

    Wow Gia! This is a fantastic piece of writing. I am desperate to know what happened next! You created suspense with the build up of detail in each sentence; ‘the creeepy, dark, gloomy woods’ and the ‘faint rustle in the bushes’ all added to my nervous feeling as a reader!

    My favourite part is ‘the bright glow of day hidden by the gnarled, twisted trees.’ This created such a vivid image in my head.

    If you were going to make this even better, what would you do?

    Well done!

    1. gia6w says:

      Thank you Miss Durcan, try to include more imagery and include personification.

  2. kian6a says:

    Wow that’s an amazing piece of writing I wish mine was that good.

  3. mrshydebvps says:

    That was super creepy! I love cliffhangers, my imagination is running in overdrive!
    Please tell me what happens next!
    Fab!

  4. Mrs Jacques says:

    I agree, really impressive! My question for you…. you used ‘dark’ twice in the last sentence – why?

  5. Mr Worrall says:

    Fantastic writing Gia! There are quite a few people who would love to know what happened next. Maybe you could write the next part to this story for them?

  6. yunis6w says:

    This is amazing I wish I could do a story like that

  7. aatiqah6a says:

    I think this is a great piece of writing as it is persuading you to read more!You’re imagination is absoloutley amazing.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *